—Jennie Rothenberg Gritz This piece of yours actually began as a blog post. She was talking about the signs that your partner might be addicted to pornography, and almost as a throwaway comment in the course of the piece she talked about how people have different expectations about pornography.
A lot of people, a lot of women especially, would feel really betrayed, she said, if they discovered that their partner was using pornography frequently—they would consider it a form of adultery.
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Julian Sanchez, a libertarian blogger, and an acquaintance of mine, responded that this was self-evidently the most ridiculous thing: How could anyone possibly believe that pornography is the same as adultery? Or, if not, is there a continuum and where does pornography fall?
And so then I embarked—in my role as the token social conservative scold in the D. blogging world, I suppose—on a series of posts trying to tease out the implications of this issue. And so out of this came the longer essay, which tries to explore the topic in more depth and hopefully come to a somewhat nuanced conclusion. Playing video games that are violent could arguably be on the same continuum as committing murder. My argument is essentially that if you do posit a continuum of infidelity, looking at hardcore pornography is much closer to straightfoward infidelity than playing Medal of Honor is to actually gunning somebody down.
These days, argues Ross Douthat in the October Atlantic, the barrier between fantasy and infidelity is becoming less and less solid.
NOT a Woodbine Kentucky girls looking for sex doormat, hookup tonite Farnham but a submissive.Instead of filing it away in an innocuous boys-will-be-boys folder, along with bachelor-parties and Pamela Anderson centerfolds, he encourages both men and women consider that watching real sex might amount to a de facto betrayal of marriage vows.The girl on the streaming video might not be one’s neighbor’s wife, but to Douthat’s mind, she’s far closer to home than she ought to be.Douthat, an Atlantic senior editor and blogger, is the co-author of the book Grand New Party: How Republicans Can Win the Working Class and Save the American Dream.We chatted about pornography one recent afternoon at the magazine’s Watergate office. In fact, it began with a column by a so-called sexpert who works for Fox News.A wife who finds a URL like in the browser history of her husband’s computer might be disgusted by his juvenile habit, but chances are she won’t file for divorce.