And then there are some who use NC to play games and provoke the person into being and doing what they want – this is the 2nd instance where NC crosses paths with disappearing because it’s with the intention of going back & trying to get things on their terms.In theory, I’m NC with a number of exes, but actually I’m living my life.Casual relationships – they’re informal and ambiguous, and if the other party is hard of hearing, they’ll keep floating around in your life treating you like a gap filler. Some people will never give you that anyway, hence NC.Yes breakups hurt, yes they’re a pain in the arse, yes some people can and should handle them better, but unless you both mutually agree that the relationship isn’t working, one of you is not going to like the decision.Trying to reason with them is like rationalising the irrational.In the worst cases, you may need to disappear instead of just rejecting contact.It’s tricky, it’s uncomfortable, they likely have some awkward discussions and arguments, but they do it because they recognise that if one or both people’s hearts aren’t in it or they’re not able to get what they need/are incompatible, it’s time to let it go.
In reality, people break up all the time without having to employ hardcore NC but being healthy enough to recognise that some distance is required and not expecting to continue on with the fringe benefits of a relationship when it suits. Every day, many people break up by uttering the words ‘I want to break up’ (or whatever) and following through.Dee’s ex kept pursuing her periodically for over ten years until she stopped taking his calls and emails.“Ten years of anxiety about when I’d hear from him next or what the hell he wanted with me is enough.It is not rare to see a younger guy and an older woman date and have a very intense sexual and romantic relationship, which defies the traditional “older man, younger woman” set-up that we are used to seeing. First, the fact that such a dating situation is still somewhat taboo makes is all the more enticing and exciting.Many younger guys are driven to women who are 10 years older than they are or more, as these women are often more confident and more sexually driven and passionate than the younger women.These younger guys are both curious and excited about dating a woman who, is not ashamed of what she wants sexually, unlike the younger girls of his own age who are often confused about just about everything, including their romantic and sexual desires.